Adoption Takes Courage

I was listening to a Rise podcast the other day, and something that the show's host, Rachel Hollis, said really stuck with me. Some people say that courage is the absence of fear. But I think that courage is being afraid, but then doing it anyway (from Rise podcast "how to start a successful blog with the alison show's alison faulkner). You can check out the podcast here.

Adoption takes courage.

It takes courage for an expectant mom to make the decision for herself and her child to find parents for someone she is creating in her womb. It takes courage to talk to a partner or her family about what she wants for this child, or to take the steps alone without that support. It takes courage to contact an agency or lawyer to tell them of her intentions to carry a child to term that she will not parent. It takes courage to look at photos and a bio of people you've never met and make the decision to contact them. It takes courage to meet these people and decide if they are the right people to raise this child. It takes courage to deliver a child and then entrust to their adoptive parents. It takes courage to sign the paperwork that will change their lives forever. It takes courage to maintain a relationship with that child, to be in their lives as a birth mother or first mom.

It takes courage to adopt a child. It takes courage to make the decision to parent a non-biological child. It takes courage to expose personal things about yourself to strangers in hopes that they will chose you to parent. It takes courage to talk to an expectant mom, hoping she will see all the love you can offer a child. It takes courage to smile at a baby shower, or congratulate those around you who are expecting. It takes courage to drive around town with a car seat in your car or walk by an empty nursery not sure when it will be occupied.

It takes courage to be adopted. It takes courage to talk to your friends about where you came from and to tell your story. It takes courage to let the parents and birthparents know what you need from them to feel whole. It takes courage to understand who you are and where you came from. It takes courage to forgive and to find the love that is in front of you rather than yearn for what could have been.

Further reading:

•  Lynn Grub: What we gain when adoptees tell their stories 

Song of the day:

The Waiting Game: Insomnia Edition

As I've mentioned several times (here, here, and here), the hardest part of the adoption process has been the waiting. Cue the Tom Petty. ♪♫♪♫♩

You sang that, didn't you?

For someone of a tenacious nature like myself who doesn't like to sit back and let things happen that are mostly out of my control, it's especially challenging. And let me tell you, it has not helped my insomnia.

This is the point where I have to note that I am not a doctor or psychiatrist, so anything I say below is not intended as medical advice, but is rather my own accounts as an chronic insomniac with some 35+ years of experience. I know, I know how can I have that much experience when I'm clearly only 21? A lady never tells. 😇

Anyway, wrinkles and chin whiskers aside, insomnia is sometimes a side effect of another thing adoptive parents experience during the adoptive process: anxiety. There are a lot of things to be anxious about while waiting, and when we let that anxiety creep over us like the fog rolling in to the vineyards of Russian River Valley, it can start to affect other facets of our life, such as our sleep.

All this fog = great Pinot Noir 🍷

I've always been a rotten sleeper. My parents love to tell me about how, when they were traveling and I was very little, I would sleep between them. I would toss and turn, and kick, and roll all over the place. Meaning none of us got many winks.

When I was still young, I was eating my huge bowl of cereal at the counter (probably Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter Crunch--that was the best), and my mom looked at me strangely and said something was off about my face. I slurped my bowl and said nothing. It took her a few moments to realize I'd pulled all my eyelashes out. She was understandably upset, and asked why in the world I would do such a thing. I told her I was bored when I couldn't sleep, so I'd plucked every last one out to bide the time.

I had a very vivid imagination as a child, so the hours spent wide awake often involved fantasies where I was a horse or in some magical land, but other times my wild imagination created scary things that kept me awake at night too. I was convinced that a vampire lived in the attic and was going to use the attic access hole in my room to swoop in and suck my blood. I even moved my bed around so I could use the mirrored closet to be able to see if anyone was sneaking up behind me, but ditched that plan when I realized that vampires aren't visible in the mirror. D'oh.

Childhood insomnia was not so bad though. I could slip into my imagination or sneak a flashlight under the covers to read another chapter in my new Brian Jacques book.

Adult insomnia is another beast entirely. Instead of ponies and princesses, I worry about deadlines, bills, and starting our family.

Here are some things that have helped me cope with insomnia. Again, these are my personal ways of coping with insomnia. Some of them may have medical research behind them, but others are just things to try.

During the day

Yep, you should start preparing for a good night's sleep as soon as you wake up. Here are some daytime habits to help you get some rest at night:

• Socialize. We humans are social creatures, yet we've begun to consider screen time (social networks, video games, etc.) as our social outlets. As someone who works from home more often than not, I sometimes go days without socializing with anyone other than my husband and dogs. Yes, I do talk to my dogs. And yes, they do talk back. Especially the husky. She's a chatty one.
  But there's still nothing quite like physically interfacing with other primates -- I mean humans. Especially as an introvert. I love talking to people. I was in hospitality for 10 years, so I do love chatting and interacting, but boy does it wipe me out. I can crash hard after a day with the family or an evening out with the girls.
• Physical exercise. This needs little explanation, but I think most of us know that this should be part of our daily routine even if you sleep like a rock as soon as your head hits the pillow. This is another one of those things that depends a lot on your own physical needs and abilities. If you're looking for an easy start that includes a way to track your activity, I suggest a FitBit or another activity tracker. Spend a normal day tracking what you normally do. Then, challenge yourself to reach another goal. If your normal day is 5,000 steps, aim for 7,000. Walking is easy for most of us, and you can do it with a friend, a child, or a pet.
  No matter what your physical exercise level, aim to at least a half hour of exercise every day. If you can break a sweat in that half hour, even better. I crash hard after a long hike (my favorite exercise).
• Mental exercise. My friend Quinn Martin and I were discussing insomnia ages ago, and I was saying how I felt I should be exhausted at the end of the day, especially after bartending a busy Saturday night, but then would lie down and be unable to sleep. He asked me a few questions about my other habits, and then asked me something I'd never considered before: "Do you exercise your mind?"  Not that bartending isn't a tough job mentally, physically, and socially, but it does not involve the real mental stimulation that Quinn was talking about. Puzzles, strategy, personal writing; a real mental workout that involves true introspection. I've found blogging can often help me with my mental workout, especially in cases where I am reflective or critical. If you're not into blogging, a personal journal or even a crossword puzzle can help you get your daily mental exercise.
• Get outside. Yes, go outside. Break that airlock on your front door and step away from the office fluorescents. Breathing fresh, oxygen rich air is good. Feeling some sun on your skin is good (with sun protection as required of course).
  I love video games. When I'm really into a game I can play for hours on end without eating, drinking, peeing, or moving. It's not a good habit. If hubby will be back late from golfing and I get the TV all to myself for the night, I know I've got some time to escape into my game (currently playing The Witcher III: The Wild Hunt). But I make sure I get a walk outside with the dogs before I submit to the "couch lock" that gaming requires.
• Eat healthy. This is hard to quantify because every person has different dietary needs and or restrictions, self-regulated or medically required. But eating healthy for most of us usually means less processed, salty, fatty or sugary foods. Basically anything you can get at 7-Eleven is out.
  
• Drink water. There used to be a short segment on my husband's morning sports radio (KNBR!) called A Better Life with Doctor Sanjay Gupta. We would always laugh at these because he would always come on and give some super obvious medical tips. Exercise is good, smoking is bad... that kind of stuff. I feel like I'm giving you that kind of advice here.
  
  Water is good. Dehydration is bad.
  
  The recommended daily intake of water is half of your body weight in pounds. For example, a person weighing 150 pounds should drink 75 ounces of water a day, or 9.5 glasses of water. Here's the math:
  150 ÷ 2 = 75 ounces of water
  75 ounces ÷ 8 ounces (what's considered a "glass") = 9.5 glasses of water per day.

• I give my electronics a bed time. Every weeknight at 8:30pm, I power down my laptop, turn off my tablet, step away from the TV (sometimes sports go late so hubby might still be watching), and put my phone on it's special place in the bookcase, upside down and far away from my bed. Giving my electronics a bed time (at least an hour before my own bedtime), allows me to de-stimulate.
• I don't drink caffeine after 2pm. My mom can drink a double shot of espresso and then fall asleep 10 minutes later. However, I am very sensitive to caffeine, and drinking it too late will affect my sleep. I also limit myself to two cups in the morning.
• I stretch or do light yoga before bed. 
• I read at least one chapter of a paper book in bed before I turn out the lights.

Before bed time

• Don't eat too close to bedtime.
• Drink water.
• Use the bathroom before bed. This may sound like your mother's admonition when you were three, but a bathroom trip in the middle of the night 
• Have a shot of ACV before bed.
• Refrain from alcohol.
• Enjoy some herbal tea.
• Meditate.
• Talk about your day with someone. I've often laid in bed for hours reviewing every interaction of the day, or
• Be creative.
• Try a weighted blanket.
• Make sure the temperature in your sleeping area is just right. I like our bedroom icy cold (sorry sweetie) with lots of warm, heavy blankets to snuggle under.
• Refrain from looking at the clock. Have you ever looked over at your glowing digital clock and done the math? If I fall asleep now, I'll have 3 hours of sleep before I have to get up. I used to stress about this all night. Now I make sure that I'm blissfully unaware of the time until my alarm wakes me in the morning.

I know that there are often prescribed and unprescribed medications that work for some people. I've never wanted to try anything that would incapacitate me in case of an emergency, so I've refrained from trying Ambien or even Tylenol PMs. My doctor did recommend time-release melatonin, but I have not tried it yet. I have tried cannabis (legal here in CA), and it does make me incredibly sleepy, but as soon as it wears off, I'm wide awake again. I suggest trying other methods before resorting to chemical intervention if you can. But always consult your doctor.

I'll leave you with this gem from one of my favorite artists of all time:

Debt Free Adoption: Employer Adoption Assistance Programs

Ack! Has it really been two months since I connected with you lovely people? I do apologize for the hiatus, but we had a lot of exciting things happen this summer (including some travel and a big job change #dreamjob). Unfortunately, no adoption news, but I still have so much more to share with you all on this site.

I credit my return to my Facebook adoption groups. I saw several people asking about this exact topic--the kind of topic that could truly add value to your lives and adoption journey!

My last Debt Free Adoption post was one of the most read, so here's the second in that series.

What is an Adoption Assistance Program?

Just like any other expecting parents, adopting a child usually means working with your employer to figure out what, if any, parental benefits they might offer. And, just like them, you will be figuring out how much paid, unpaid, or partially paid time off you can take to bond with your new baby or child. But, instead of calculating insurance coverage for costs associated with with birth, you will want to check in to any Adoption Assistance Programs that may be available through your employer. While it's more likely for a larger employer to participate in these kinds of programs, it never hurts to check, even with a smaller business! It could mean a couple thousand dollars to help offset your adoption fees. As part of my Debt Free Adoption series, this article will cover how to check if your employer offers adoption benefits, and how to ask for benefits or an increase in those benefits.

A few things to be aware of:

• Most companies won't provide reimbursement until the adoption is finalized.
• Most companies have a max payout per year or per child.
• If you and your partner are both employed at this company, there may be stipulations about how much you can apply for.
• You will most likely pay income tax on the disbursement.
• You will have to provide receipts and proof of costs.
• You may not be able to use the same costs you used for your Adoption Tax Credit.
• Get ready for more paperwork. But you're used to it by now, right?

While reviewing the hiring packet and benefits at my previous company back in 2012, I remember scanning the Adoption Assistance benefits and thinking, "How nice for those people. What a generous company I work for." I never even guessed that I'd be reading that same document 5 years later with an entirely different perspective.

Today, I'd like to share how I worked with our benefits manager and HR team to improve the existing Adoption Assistance Program at that job. Before I meddled, the reimbursement amount was $1,500. While this amount is definitely helpful, it was not on par with other companies of a similar size.

Do Your Homework

Before you start preparing your email or speech or however you want to approach this, determine the following:

• What, if any, current benefits are provided by your employer.
• Research what other local companies of a similar size are offering.
• Consider appealing to their humanitarian side with a brief personal account of your adoption journey, how you're pursuing adoption, and what it may cost you.
• How you will appeal to your company to increase this benefit. Consider how this perk would be useful to them, such as:
• attracts quality employees.
• could become an Adoption Friendly Workplace.
• provides peace of mind to HAPs (Hopeful Adoptive Parents).
• offers a very attractive benefit without a big cost (percentage of employees who will use this benefit is low).
• advocates for adoption.

Prepare Your Plea

Here's a secret: you don't have to come up with this stuff on your own! There's a fabulous resource called the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption that honors Adoption-Friendly Workplaces and provides an excellent toolkit with everything you'll need to work with your employer to improve or implement a Adoption Assistance Program. This toolkit includes:

• Adoption benefits fact sheet
• Adoption benefits tax summary
• FAQs
• Sample adoption benefits financial reimbursement form
• Sample adoption benefits news release
• Sample adoption benefits policy
• Sample adoption benefits proposal

Basically everything you need to make an excellent case for a new or improved program that will help you and future adoptive parents at your company is included in this kit.

Unfortunately, I did not discover this resource until after I went out on my own to plead my case with HR. Here is my actual email to our benefits managers (names changed to protect the innocent).

From: Kira
Sent: Tuesday, May 30, 2017 11:30 AM
To: Jill Johnson, Briar Abramson

Subject: Comcotech Adoption Assistance Program

Hi Jill and Briar,

My husband and I are pursuing adoption, and I was checking out the Comcotech adoption assistance program. We very much appreciate that Comcotech is willing to help with some of the expense. During my adoption research, I noticed that the average company that offers assistance provides closer to $4,000 (or, according to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, $7,000). As a local example, Medcocom provides $5,000 (up to $10,000 per year) for its employees.

Our adoption will cost us at least $25,000, but maybe as much as $40,000, so we are looking for as much help as we can get. I was hoping Comcotech could review its adoption benefits. Adoption benefits are a very attractive recruiting perk, but they are only used by 0.5% of employees, creating a cost effective recruiting item. Comcotech can also get recognition for being an adoption friendly workplace: https://davethomasfoundation.org/partner/become-an-adoption-friendly-workplace/

Thank you for this consideration,

Kira

What's next???

Let's say that all your hard work pays off and your company approves the new or improved Adoption Assistance Program, which is what happened for me.

Hard work is done, right? Well, yes, but make sure that you:

• Acknowledge and thank everyone involved in this success.
• Share the new program with other employees and even your network of friends and family.
• Nominate your company for the Adoption-Friendly Workplace awards.

Here's a real-life Adoption Assistance program example:

If your lobbying was unsuccessful and no changes were made or program was implemented, don't despair! You can always try another tactic or angle, or look for another employer who does offer this perk.

Stay tuned for more Debt Free Adoption posts coming soon!

Adoptees Who Inspire: Colin Kaepernick

Note: This is not a political blog, and this is not a political post. The Adoption Journal does not discuss politics unless it pertains directly to adoption. Any negative comments will not be tolerated. This is a profile about a professional football player who was raised by a family as part of a transracial adoption. In the spirit of fairness, I must mention that I am also working on an article about Roseanne Barr, another controversial celebrity, who is also a birthmother. Thanks for checking your opinions at the door.
 

Hubby ready for the 2012 football season repping Jerry Rice

Yes, we're Bay Area sports fans. You may have heard me mention the San Francisco Giants or the Golden State Warriors in some of my other posts. We are also fans of the San Francisco 49ers (Brian more than me--I'm mostly in it for the game time food and beer). Unfortunately, they haven't had much to celebrate lately. Their last hurrah was the 2013 Super Bowl, where they lost a heart wrenching game to the Baltimore Ravens 34-31.

You can actually pinpoint the second when his heart breaks in half.

Devastating chokage aside, another thing happened in 2012: a young backup quarterback named Colin Kaepernick got a lot more game time when the starting quarterback, Alex Smith, was out with a concussion.

But let's back up 25 years...

Colin was born in 1987 to a young woman named Heidi Russo in Wisconsin. Heidi was a single mother; Colin's dad was not in the picture. When he was five weeks old, she decided to place him with a white family who could provide for him in ways she felt that she could not. Teresa and Rick Kaepernick already had two children older than Colin, but they had lost two other kids to heart defects. They called him "our little Colin."

Little Colin with his siblings Kyle and Devon

The family moved to Central California, where Colin starting playing football at age eight, and was the starting quarterback by age nine. A 4.0 student in high school, he played football, baseball, and basketball. According to Colin, “When adults were unaware of who my mother was at little league baseball games, it was her that gave a tongue-lashing to the parents in the stands speaking ill about the black child striking out all of their sons.” Read more here.

Colin faced some challenging moments growing up in his mixed race family as an adopted child, with kids asking who his real mother was, or confusion on vacations when someone thought he wasn't part of his family.

“You have a family that you love, but you know you don’t look like. And at a young age, I understood that I was different; I didn’t understand what that meant. So, as I got older it was something that developed. As my identity developed and my place in society and my understanding of that developed, my parents and my family had developed as well.”

Most known for his baseball prowess, he was offered several scholarships to play college baseball. However, playing football was his heart's desire. At 6'5" and 170lbs, he was prone to injury, but he persisted. He sent DVDs of his highlights to multiple colleges, but had no takers. It wasn't until a University of Nevada assistant coach saw Colin dominate in a basketball game while running a 103 degree temperature that he finally got his scholarship offer.

Throwing out the opening pitch at AT&T Park in San Francisco

Colin had a great college football career, and even holds some NCAA records. Ever the prolific athlete, he was even drafted in the 2009 Major League Baseball draft as the 43rd pick by the Chicago Cubs, but declined the offer to continue his college football career and earn his business management degree.

In April 2011, the San Francisco 49ers drafted Colin as a back up quarterback. He got little play in his first season, but stood in for and eventually replaced starting quarterback Alex Smith in 2012 and playing in the Super Bowl that year. *heart ripping sounds*

Colin played for the 49ers for a few more years before departing from the team. In a very polarizing act, he chose to sit and then kneel during the national anthem as a peaceful protest for the inequality of people of color. Many other players followed suit in various displays of peaceful protest. The acts sparked a lot of outrage, even angering President Trump into denouncing anyone who followed suit. The controversy led to low ratings for the NFL that year, and Colin's eventual challenges finding a new team.

Colin's activism didn't stop  there. He was honored as GQ's Citizen of the Year for his continued efforts to expose inequality.

Colin's relationship with his birthmother Heidi is unclear. She has been vocal on Twitter (where some of her opinions were attacked because she adopted out her son), but no evidence exists that discloses what, if any, contact the two may have.

He is very open about his mom Teresa, and even shared his love and appreciation for her on
VH1’s Dear Mama: A Love Letter to Moms. 

"As a child, I would draw family pictures in kindergarten, fully aware of that fact that I had to switch the colors of the crayons. While I did wonder who I looked like, I never had to wonder whether my mother loved me or not."

Colin with proud mom and dad

Be sure to check out our other Adoptees Who Inspire:

• Jamie Foxx
• Babe Ruth
• Brandon Elder 

And coming soon:

• Keegan-Michael Key (of Key & Peele)
• Darryl McDaniels (of Run D.M.C)
• Sarah McLachlan (of the ASPCA commercials you flip away from)
• Dave Thomas (Wendy's founder)
• Faith Hill ("Don't want your bed of rooooses...")

One Year Reflections as a Hopeful Adoptive Family

What better way to start this lovely Memorial Day weekend than with some reflections on the past crazy year?!

Last May, hubby and I made the choice to adopt. It was almost exactly two years since we had decided to actively start trying to grow our family, and we were so ready to start a new chapter in our quest for parenthood.

Here we are, one year later. One year more hopeful, one year wiser. It's had its ups and downs. At times it's incredible, other times it's stressful.

Incredible Stuff

• Learning about adoption
• Sharing our adoption story so far
• So many new books to read!
• Meeting other hopeful adoptive parents
• Preparing our nursery (almost ready for our reveal)! Squee!
• Advocating for adoption and teaching others
• Learning from other parents
• Hearing birthfamily stories
• Connecting with other people who struggled to start their family
• Getting closer to each other as we discuss parenting

 Stressful Stuff

• Adoption paperwork 
• The home study
• The waiting game
• Planning for adoption expenses
• Anxiety about profile perfection

One year breakdown

May 2017
While hiking beautiful Taylor Mountain in Santa Rosa, CA, my husband and I waxed introspective over our situation. We'd reached the end to what our infertility treatments could do for us, and the next steps were either pursue IVF, continue organically, or adopt. I'm happy to say that we chose adoption (obviously). We shared our happy news with our families on Mother's Day. You can hear more about our Road to Adoption story in this radio interview.

Taylor Mountain Regional Park

May 2017 - June 2017
We selected our agency and began the application process. The application was very involved and emotional, so it took us both nearly a month to get through it.

July 2017 - August 2017
We did our home study, prepared our adoption brochures and adoption profile.

September 2017
Officially paper pregnant and a waiting family!

September 2017- May 2018
We're still waiting! We have high hopes that 2018 is the year we complete our family, but the average wait time is 18 months, and we've only got 8 under our belts. So who knows?

January 2018
We announced our adoption plans to our wider group of friends and family.

 

March 2018
I started The Adoption Journal as a way to chronicle our family's adoption journey. In just two months, it's morphed into so much more.
 
May 2018
We worked hard to create a beautiful, gender neutral nursery that is ready for personal touches once our baby is home with us and we get to know each other. Cannot wait!

Our nursery "before" picture. Stay tuned for the reveal!

Is there anything we would have done differently?

Not everything has been perfect, but there isn't much I would change. I would have announced our adoption a bit earlier to start our personal networking earlier. I've heard so many stories about people finding their expectant mom through a coworker, distant relative, or friend of a friend. While we we've had a few nibbles, the right situation hasn't presented itself yet, so we're still waiting for our match. I still think we need to market ourselves more, and we will probably start to do so in the near future with a Facebook page.

I also would have employed a professional to do our adoption brochure the first time, rather than spending the time and money to do it once myself, then have A Touch of LA make a far better one.

Today
Our Golden State Warriors play this evening in the NBA Western Conference against the Houston Rockets. They're down 2-3 in the series, and are facing elimination tonight in Oakland. I know that the team is preparing itself for a big night, and that they will give it all they've got in front of their home crowd. We don't have the funds to be in the building watching them, but we will be rooting for them loudly (sorry neighbors) from our comfy couch.

We did splurge on playoffs tickets in 2016

This momentous night reminds me of this Steph Curry quote I've always liked, and I think it also applies to our adoption journey. We're nervous and anxious for our big moment: the moment when we finally get to be parents. But being nervous means we're ready. And we are so ready.

Go dubs!

Debt Free Adoption: Kelly Daniel's Debt Free Scream!

I'm so sorry that I was away for awhile! I got to visit my family for a few days for an early Mother's Day, and have been extra busy at work as my employer prepares for approximately one million software releases this month. 😱 Thanks for sticking with me despite my absence. You're the best!
 

Visiting with my nephew Jaxon - such a cutie!

Today I want to talk about one of the biggest hurdles of adoption: cost. The reality is that it can be very, very expensive to adopt a child. Many hopeful parents have already spent thousands on infertility treatments before deciding to adopt. Even without prior attempts at pregnancy, most adoptive couples can expect to pay between $8,000 to $40,000, according to multiple sources.

Because money is such a big consideration when adopting, and can cause a lot of stress for so many of us, I'm starting a Debt Free Adoption series. This is the first article.

As a hopeful adoptive mom myself, I'm a member of several adoption support groups. Many folks in these groups are stressed about how they will pay the fees that they know they are facing. It breaks my heart to see people taking out HELOCs, using credit cards, payday advances, or personal loans to add the child they've been dreaming of to their family.

I'm a big believer in living a debt free life, and I'm a big Dave Ramsey fan. If you're not familiar with Dave, he's a man whose lucrative multi-million dollar real estate venture collapsed when he was in his 20s, and he found himself in massive debt. Through some really hard work, discipline, and sacrifice, he was able to turn things around, get out of debt, and build another multi-million dollar business without relying on other people's money. And he never returned to those old habits once he got out of that choke hold. After going through all this hardship to gain his freedom, he wanted to help others who were also burning in the hell of financial servitude to lenders. He created a program with seven baby steps to help people get control of their own money, get out of debt, build wealth, and give generously.

Can't wait for step 7! 💜

Bottom line: Dave does not believe in borrowing money. Coming from the perspective of one of those people who did spend thousands of dollars on infertility treatments prior to deciding to adopt (and who did borrow some money for those procedures 😬), I understand that this might sound a little crazy. But you can adopt without debt, or pay off your adoption debt if you already have it. So, how does anyone adopt without debt?!

You can download this chart here.

 
Unfortunately, I'll have to leave you with a cliffhanger on that topic for now, but I do want to share a special story that comes from The Dave Ramsey Show, the sixth most popular radio show in the US. If you're not ready to read The Total Money Makeover or join a Financial Peace University class, I highly recommend listening to the show. You can find it in podcast form on Spotify and iTunes. It's incredibly inspiring and educational. My favorite part of the show is when people come to do their debt-free screams.

Kelly Daniel is a producer on the show, and little did we all know that she has been on her own debt free journey for the past five and a half years. She's also an adoptive parent whose children have costly physical, emotional, and developmental special needs. I won't spoil her family's extraordinary journey with all its ups and downs because it's better in their own words (and wait for that triumphant debt free scream). But I can tell you that there is a lot of emotion as her family celebrates the next chapter in their lives.
 

What freedom feels like!

You can watch their heartwarming story on the recorded version of the show below:



Isn't this a beautiful tale? And look at her amazing kids. Totally worth it.

Stay tuned for more on debt free adoption, including how to:

• Fund raise.
• Apply for grants.
• Apply for tax credits.
• Get assistance from your employer.
• Use Dave Ramsey's baby steps to help you adopt debt free or pay off adoption debt.

I will also share our own debt free adoption story (so far), and hopefully those of other adoptive parents. If you have a story about your own debt free adoption, or how you got out of debt after adopting that you want to share, please Contact Us.